Triangles of Love Part Two
“In my life there’s been heartache and pain; I don’t know if I can face it again. Can’t stop now; I’ve traveled so far to change this lonely life. I wanna know where love is; I want you to show me. I wanna feel what love is. I know you can show me…..” ~I Want to Know What Love Is by Foreigner from the 40 year edition album. It was 1977-2017.
I close my eyes today. I choose not to cry. I look out the window where my daddy died because I’m in my parents’s bedroom typing this article on a desk I purchased for myself some years ago but I haven’t been able to use it. I haven’t been able to live for ever so long. I don’t know why. The Holy Spirit and ArchAngel Gabriel, once each, told me not to ask why. I never did. It is all glory to GOD.
October 18, 2014, was the day. I cannot remember because I don’t need to. Some things are burned onto your heart and you never forget the searing pain of it. This was the first time I’d sent my phone number to any man, and that man was a cousin. I emailed him about something and that is meaningless to me. They all thought whatever they thought. But it wasn’t the truth whatever it was and GOD is not mocked, you see.
It was 81 years for my gran-daddy, and just three days more when he laid dead in the street on October 21, 1933. Dad died at age 81, and just three hours before a wedding anniversary for Curtis and me. Death never is surrounded by much of life in my story just now for a 51 year life. God help me. The day after that date in 2014, Curtis would turn 52 but there was no rest for me with any human, no there wasn’t.
And that is when Jesus came in spirit life to me. I remember exactly where I was; where He seemed to be as the Morning Star, and it was that Desperate Man who showed me how very wrong everything was. Remember Cara, I’m Human. I can barely see His Face but I saw the Same Face in a store, and that Face was Father’s, Ethereal, Death in Life, Solemn. I’d seen that LOOK twice.
It was the day I saw John Paul Jackson die. I went to him in spirit; I prayed. I begged GOD to give us that human back. Now, I wish I’d just let him go considering the pain of my Love Jesus Christ but Jesus never put the expectation upon me that humans young and old always have. They always will. And that is true world and time-wide. Humans have expectations.
GOD is TRUE. Therein is a difference that gets many a person caught in their own issues of humanity I suppose, but I don’t care anymore. You hurt my Love and the children–you have no thought for the children in all of your stupid wisdom across these nine years, oh Americans older than me.
It is that simple. He forgives it, but is that any consolation to me?
No. And I never ask why so no worries; no worries. You’ve got your Jesus. I have nothing but the understanding today that my Love is a Foreigner in His Own Earth and nobody in America seems to care unless I can tell you care.
And there are many humans now whom I can tell care. They looked to their leadership to do the right thing and those of leadership didn’t do the right thing. That’s why you have Doug Addison releasing a blog article about a dream he had years ago: it was about a tornado and how you must let go of current status (position) to fly. It’s called free-falling in faith. It is too late. It is too late for my Love Jesus. But my question to Him is simple. Must He and I remain foreigners in His Own Earth? This is no fairy tale. It is as real as real gets in Jesus Name, amen.